A new round of “sleep training”

But they are so CUTE when they are sleeping. It makes you forget how psychotic they were just minutes ago.

But they are so CUTE when they are sleeping. It makes you forget how psychotic they were just minutes ago.

I didn’t know sleep regressions were a thing until I was frantically Googling why my baby couldn’t sleep and found out that kids can go backwards. How cruel! Who designed babies to be this way?! And it’s not just a baby thing. Sleep regressions last into toddlerhood! Pair that with a mini-gymnast, and you have one hell of a rough ride ahead of you. I feel like I am obsessed with sleep between Joseph’s craziness and my own. 

I knew he had gotten out of his crib before he started rattling the doorknob because his cries sounded so much closer. Sure enough, he climbed out of his crib. I knew it was going to happen one of these days. How he managed to do it without hurting himself is a miracle.

My kid hates bedtime. Always has. Almost every night it is a battle to get him down. He loves living his life so much! He loves spending time with us! We finally got him to fall asleep on his own without us, probably around 12 months. Although it always seemed to involve a lot of crying and multiple wake-ups during the night. There was a stretch of a month when he went down easy for nap and bed, and slept a solid 12 hours. It was glorious! Well, not for me since I have insomnia, but MAN was it nice to have some predictability.

That first night he climbed out of his crib, Joseph slept in our bed. The next day I put him down for a nap in his crib, praying he would forget about his newfound skill. Mind you, I heavily padded around his crib, just in case. Sure enough he got out AND figured out how to open the door. Aye.

So Josh fixed his bed and turned it into a toddler bed. We bought the safety rail. Joe wouldn’t even go near it! It was only 3 days until our dreaded trip to Ottawa, so we toughed it out and had him sleep with us.

The 5 days we were in Ottawa was a pretty big nightmare in terms of sleep. Thank goodness Nona was there, and she put Joseph to bed the first 3 nights. Mind you, he always woke up crying and tried to make his way down Nona’s death stairs looking for us. I nearly ripped my toe off that first night trying to get to him before he hopped over the make-shift baby gate and tumbled down the stairs. My anxiety was through the roof.  At the end of our trip, we just gave up putting him in is own room and had him in bed with us. Nap times were in the car, driving around Ottawa for an hour so he could sleep, because honestly nothing is worse than a tired toddler.

Those toes!!!

Those toes!!!

Passed out at Nona's. The sleep strike, apparently, only lasts so long.

Passed out at Nona’s. The sleep strike, apparently, only lasts so long.

We thought we could save face by lowering the crib even more when we got home. Josh put it down a few inches by drilling new holes. He had to stand on his tiptoes to see over the edge. We thought we were safe. Unfortunately, Joe got out, and this time fell and hurt himself. It is so sickening hearing your baby hit the floor.  We should have known and put padding around. I feel sick just thinking about it now. PPA definitely triggered. Joe has been in our bed for the last 3 nights as we wait for his new mattress to be delivered. Bedtime takes 1 hour as we try to settle him in our bed. His mattress comes tomorrow for his big bed, and I am dreading what lies ahead. While in Ottawa we bought a book, The Happy Sleeper, to help us through this transition.

I just can’t believe we are here again. Trying to teach Joseph how to sleep on his own. Except now he isn’t in his crib. He is in his room. How is ever going to connect the dots? That his bed is for sleeping and he can control how and when he gets there? How long will it take the first night? How long will it take before he can just fall asleep on his own without tears?

Life as a parent seems to be moving from one cataclysmic event to the next! It is so dramatic. I feel like my life is just so out of control.


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